My Qu-heroes

What is this process of Gay Iconic veneration? 

Looking back on the iconography of my earlier life, (Kenneth Williams, Quentin Crisp, Judy Garland, Barbara Streisand, Freddy Mercury, Will Young), I see how, with each figure, I managed to create an image-construct. Its value, for me, being that of knowing there was a story of a real person, like my own queer struggling self, who was capable of transcending adversity (or if not, was at least enduring its suffering in a truly fabulous way!) These Gay Icons gave me the courage to come out of my closet. They were individuals who dared to express their forbidden amazingness and desires shamelessly.

More recently however, I’ve had little spells of hero worship for gay men who are remembered for their role as visionaries, political activists and fighters for queer social justice. Here are my top 3…

Walt Whitman: 19th Century American poet who dared to openly publish poems about “the manly love of comrades” at a time when celebrating a reality which included sex would have him branded as an obscene writer throughout his lifetime. His poetry strongly influenced…

Edward Carpenter: Early 20th Century British writer and socialist poet who became a hero to the first generation of Labour politicians. At a time of Victorian homophobia (his contemporary Oscar Wilde was imprisoned for 2 years with hard labour for the crime of “gross indecency with sodomy”) he managed to live in an openly gay relationship and publish books allowing folk to discuss the possibility that sexual orientation was natural and biologically determined rather than being something to be morally condemned or criminalised. His books were read by…

Harry Hay: (1912-2002) American communist who was able to see the link between queer and black oppression and had the vision and courage to establish the first, pre-Stonewall gay rights movement called the Mattachine Society. Doing this meant risking his life, his job and his liberty. 

The Society became a victim of its own success, got a sudden influx of conservative members who saw Hay’s communism, at a time of McCarthy’s witch-hunt trials, as a liability, ousted him and established itself as an assimilationist lobby. 

Undaunted Hay then went on to argue for a different kind of liberation. For queers to ‘cast off the ugly frog-skin of hetero-conformity’ and for them to discover their queer purpose through the realisation of their true faerie nature in community at Faerie Gatherings.

I suppose I’ve been following Harry’s lead in this respect for the past 10 years or so. For me he’s not so much an Icon or Hero-to-worship. In fact the more I’ve learned about his egocentricity, intellectual bullying, and temper tantrums, the less I feel I would have liked him as a person!

He’s more of a flawed fore-father-figure…a guiding queer ancestor…a giant who stood on giant’s shoulders. 

His own shoulders now invite us all to step up and see the amazing view!

Full Spectrum Faerie Sex Magick

The Faeries are a fairly diverse bunch of queers.

However, in the early days, 40 years or so ago, at the very first gatherings of Faeries, the vast majority of attendees were gay men who were drawn to the idea of meeting together as faggots in nature to celebrate their sissy selves and explore their spiritual consciousness, asking the questions: 'Who are we, where are going, and what are we for?'

From the exploration of these questions, (and from a growing awareness that, although a lot of gay men seemed to be having a lot of sex, they were often craving an intimacy with each other which seemed forever-out-of-reach), there emerged an intensive workshop aimed at helping those who felt the call, to delve into the personal and interpersonal reasons for the many obstacles to intimacy encountered by gay men. These healing workshops, facilitated by volunteer Faeries, for the benefit of Faeries, have been running for the past 30 years and are known as Faerie Sex Magick (FSM) Workshops.

These days Faerie-space is now a much more diverse and inclusive network where those from across the full range of the LGBTQIA+ spectrum are invited to enrich the exploration in community of the questions: 'How does it feel when a) I dare to stand in the full power of my sexual orientation b) the expression of my gender identity is not only unrestrained but is completely appreciated and celebrated?'

Until now the FSM workshops have been confined to fagot identified men. The logic for this being that there is a real kind of hurt experienced by faggots growing up in a homophobic social environment, and that faggots are best able to develop an understanding of this. Fags are uniquely able to sooth and heal each other's wounds around blocks to intimacy related to this kind of trauma.

However in recent years trans* men have been invited to attend the workshop and during this time there has also been a growing momentum of enthusiasm to have FSM workshop participants reflecting the full diversity of identities and sexualities present at modern Faerie Gatherings.

So very soon there will be the pilot of a workshop which will be open to the full spectrum of queer sexualities and genders. What will happen when a fully inclusive group sits in heart circle to explore the obstacles to emotional and physical intimacy that exist between them? 

The intention of the heart circling within the traditional workshop is to reach a state of community trust to the extent that co-created rituals, involving permitted group erotic touch, are able to be devised and consensually enacted.

How might this look between individuals not accustomed to considering erotic touch with genders and sexualities beyond their habitual erotic arousal patterns?

Nobody knows but it’s the beginning of a radical adventure into a better understanding of how faerie queers, with a range of sexuality and gender expression, might more freely express the erotic together in community…

Watch this space!

“Please Don’t be Creepy!”

“Please Don’t be Creepy!”

This request, together with a profile pic of an attractive young man, was all there was to the Grindr profile... 

It got me thinking about all the things that I might say or do to others that could creep them out. 

The #MeToo campaign has highlighted the shocking extent of unacknowledged sexual abuse in the form of implicit casting couch imperatives for career advancement in the entertainment industry. There is also, now, an ever growing recognition of the high prevalence of workplace based sexual harassment in general. 

Since sexual creepiness has been an integrally endemic background feature of my culture, the chances are, I’ve got some blind spots and it therefore behoves me to examine the extent to which creepiness has crept into me!

With this in mind I took the question “How might I be creepy?” to a week-long Faerie retreat. One of the glorious aspects of Faerie community is its queer diversity in terms of shapes, sizes, ages, genders, races, and sexualities. So I began to explore, privileged as I am, with elder, white, middle class, apparently-cis-male, predominantly homophilic status, how that capital might possibly be being unconsciously exploited in the pursuit of my erotic interests.

Faeries often tend to be seekers from a broad set of spiritual backgrounds. Newcomers to Faerie-space are particularly vulnerable, often, having rejected a rejecting and sex-negative Abrahamic belief system- possibly exploring for the first time a more earth-based and sex-positive framework.

So here’s what I came up with after a week of enquiry and meditation…

• The essence of creepiness is a mismatch between professed and actual intention. If I were to present myself as someone who is available to give help, advice, and guidance on how best to negotiate Faerie-space whilst secretly lusting after, and planning on the sexual conquest of a newfound ‘apostle’ then I’m being as creepy as a creepy fingered masseur who has offered the service of a massage but who is, instead, covertly taking sexual pleasure from the tactile sensation from his wandering hands!
• Emotional authenticity with full transparency of intention is key to establishing creepy-free relationships.
• When there exists some kind of power gradient across a relationship regarding e.g. youthfulness, attractiveness, maturity, experience, wealth, etc., I need to give voice to what is there, and explicitly acknowledge the real possibility that this differential of capital may be open to emotional or sexual exploitation.
• Super-creepiness happens when sexual overtures are made and continue to be made in the absence of a receptive audience. It becomes abusive if it continues after it has been made clear that the sexual attention is unwanted.
• Once intentions have been made clear, and the potential for abuse across power gradients has been explored then clarity of consent is paramount. “How would you like me to enter into intimacy with you? How would you like to enter into intimacy with me?” If these questions can be answered with clarity and if the answers can be honoured fully then we’re likely to have moved into a creepy-free zone!

To Other or not to Other?: That is the Question!

A very creative performer friend of mine recently posted on Facebook just how much he HATED the Red Hot Chilli Peppers. And then a few days later in a different post, a disabled friend proclaimed how disappointed he was that he had finally sunk to a new low in that he had just had sex with a guy who wore Crocs (by the way that guy was me!). Both posts released a torrent of seemingly harmless, supportive hatred from friends and followers. All were in agreement that these subjects were quite legitimate targets for their light-hearted communal disapprobation. Who could get hurt? After all the RHCP are just a bunch of over rated, over-played recording artists! And aren't Croc wearers just seriously fashion challenged idiots? Right?

I wondered just how my sensitive, performer friend would have felt if someone had lanced a 'social media anger abscess' in his direction with the purulent exudate engulfing him and his vulnerable creative offerings. I certainly didn't feel unscathed by the wave of Croc-hatred unleashed by my disabled friend. I ended up pondering just how many times he might have had to endure the discomfort of witnessing 'harmless' disablist sentiments.

It seems like the public articulation of ‘dislikes’ is becoming something of an international pastime, opening up widening chasms between diametrically opposed echo chambers which themselves splinter and fragment!

Essentially, there’s a whole lot of ‘othering’ going on. 

Othering is the process of casting a person (or group) in the role of ‘the other’ and establishing one’s own identity through opposition to and, frequently vilification of this ‘other’

In my experience of facilitating Faerie Sex Magick Workshops, I have found it to be the single most common source of blocks between workshop participants, creating what, at times, seem to be insurmountable barriers to the potential that intimacy might be possible between certain individuals within the group. What’s magickal about the workshop, though, is that the other-ers are meeting together day after day in an emotionally intimate group setting where compassion and empathy has space to grow. And in this context the ‘other’ can be viewed as a potential source of learning; this ‘other’ can begin to be seen as a diverse and complex entity worthy of love and desire, even!

So how might this burgeoning social media-amplified other-ing compulsion be countered? 

First of all, to recognise that it is happening. Secondly to register when it is happening. And finally to decide NOT to define oneself through opposition to any individual or group.

It’s really up to you!

To Other:Verb transitive. The act of holding intransigent exclusionary values as a means of creating blocks which become insurmountable barriers to the potential for an intimacy to develop between the 'othering' human being and 'othered' human being....

If another others you, well, it just feels like poo!

Other another: Judge the book by its cover...

Don't other that other-er!

One way or the other, that other-er's your brother-er

Could you make 'em your lover-er?

It's all down to you!

Btw: No Femmes! No Smokers! No H&H! No Twinks! No Partnered! No Tories! No Trump Supporters! No Brexiteers!

We are STARDUST!

A friend just recently back from a meditation retreat in India was reflecting with me on the meaning of Life, the Universe and Everything….

We got to talking about death and suffering and the extent to which the unarticulated fear of death and chronic, painful terminal illness can loom over us, limiting how we might live our lives in the fullest possible way.

My friend asked me ‘Do you believe that all that you are disappears when you die?’

My answer: ’I don’t know-nobody knows!’

That, for me is what makes it such an interesting journey to be on. It’s a journey I’ve been on from the moment my germinal ovum kissed one microscopically small tadpole of a sperm cell. Death and dying are the YIN to the YANG of life and living.

I told my friend I was ready for death. Cultivating a fascination for my creeping decrepitude and decay was becoming my Next Big Project. He wondered how I had reached this contented level of equanimity towards a subject that most are programmed to avoid like the plague.

On reflection it’s probably something to do with how I have come to feel about the questions ‘Who am I?’ and ‘What happens to ‘who I am’ in death?’

So who am I? Apart from being a big old queer!

My presence is indisputably in existence on a number of parallel levels:

The scientist/materialist would say I am the sum total of all the atoms and molecules which make up the compounds, water, salts, proteins, fats, carbohydrates, cell walls and DNA of my body and all the electrostatic and electromagnetic forces around and between them. In death every atom of this aspect of my presence is available for re-purposing elsewhere: Stardust to Stardust!

The zoologist would say that I am a mammalian creature who has a survival instinct; hardwired to breathe, keep warm, drink, piss, eat, shit and f*ck.

The magician would say that I am a magickal creature, invested with my very own sovereign power to purposefully manifest. To energise thoughts and ideas, to authentically articulate and express emotions and to cultivate nature in all its aspects.

As a Faerie, my presence is about acknowledging the full spectrum of my emotional life and giving this permission to take up space. I’m acknowledging my fears and developing a fierceness in my determination to become who I am purposed to be. Feeling relief as I connect to nature. Allowing myself to feel anger, awe, joy, love compassion and intuition.

As a thinker, I have a presence which shows up as my thoughts, ideas, values and beliefs. Some believe this presence is who they are!

I’m certain that all of these aspects of who I am will have an impact beyond the date of my death. Just as the presences of all my queer ancestors have impacted on my own sense of purpose.

Beyond this, who knows what lives on. Soul? Nature Spirit? …..Back to the Garden?

I’ll know when it happens!

Hope Along the Wind: A Film About the Sussex Man who Started Two Queer Revolutions in the USA!

Gay Socrates talks to Harry Hay's friend and carer Joey Cain about Hay, the man, and the movie made about his life, coming to the Brighton Fringe next month.

Harry Hay (1912-2002) was born in Worthing. As an adult he became a gay activist in the US and founded the first Gay Liberation movement (The Mattachine Society) in 1950. He then went on to co-found the Radical Faeries.

'Hope Along the Wind...' is a lovely movie which sets this unlikely story in its historic context and captures rare interview footage of this iconic character in his later years.

Joey Cain knew Harry in person and was one of the devoted band of 'Loving Companions' who tended to the care of Harry and his partner in their closing years. For the 100th anniversary of Harry’s birth in 2012, he curated a major exhibition about his life and times in San Francisco and co-organized a conference about Harry in New York City.

Joey is flying from his home in San Francisco to present a screening of this movie as part of the Brighton Fringe Festival next month. 

GS: Who was Harry Hay to you?

JC: Harry was a dear friend, political comrade and gay visionary the likes of which we probably won’t see again. Without his tenacity, deep thinking and integrity, the LGBT revolution, at least as far as the USA goes, would have been a much longer time coming. He traversed many worlds, as Gay people often do.

A Communist activist and great music lover who was a trained baritone, he read long and deep in history and anthropology to find the hidden history of our People.

GS: Why are you bringing Harry Hay's story to the Brighton Fringe?

JC: Harry was born in Worthing, his birth house still stands, and we thought it would be a lovely idea to “bring Harry back” to this part of England, where he started out. This whole area is so rich in Queer history what with Edward Carpenter being born in Brighton, Oscar Wilde writing “The Importance of being Ernest” practically around the corner from where Harry was born. And that’s just scratching the surface.

GS: Why do you think conceiving of the Radical Faeries was important to Harry?

JC: Harry always said that the Radical Fairies was the realization of the dream he had when he started The Mattachine Society in 1950. The essence lies in the 3 questions he posed to be answered by both groups: Who are we? Where do we come from? Why are we here? For Harry, the Fairies were about answering those questions and acting on the answers.

'Hope Along the Wind: The Life of Harry Hay' is showing at the Fabrica Gallery, Tuesday May 8 7.30pm 

Tickets: https://www.brightonfringe.org/whats-on/harry-hay-founder-of-the-radical-faeries-124999/

The Epiphany as Magical Radical Politico-Spiritual Direct Action

I’ve had a few major Epiphanies during my life so far.

That dawning realisation at a time of crisis. The seeing of the truth of something unproven. That sudden recognition of purpose…

There’s always a numinous sense of ‘Higher Power’. An alliance of self with ethereal.

My first Epiphany was when I could see no other way than to be true to myself and my sexuality when I (finally) came out at the age of 20. I was depressed, hopeless and in despair at the time, and, 'coming out' was this profoundly religious resolution for what had become a totally fucked up unhappy life. And thus was created a reality receptive to my starved appetite for sexual encounters with men.

Subsequently, taking ‘coming-out’ to it’s logical political conclusion I became one of the Stonewall supporters pushing for assimilation (accept us please because we’re just the same as you apart from our sexuality) and basic equality rights. At the time I never imagined that there would ever be rights for LGBTQ+ers to adopt children or to marry in my lifetime. The very fact of this immense socio-political shift in the course of just a few years, for me, is testament to the existence of Magick: the art of changing consciousness at will by the setting of intention (against all odds!)

I’ve had other sizeable Epiphanies but my most recent one- around 10 years ago- happened after I had cornered myself into a heteronormative assimilationist lifestyle. Ostensibly monogamous and middle class, locked into a busy professional career, partnered to a lover who had become asexual and was suffering from chronic fatigue. I was thoroughly miserable! Once again the Epiphany came to the rescue. 

Thankfully my openness to that leap of imagination, into something unestablished, unproven, messy and chaotic- my spirituality- allowed The Faerie Tribe to enter into my life and in this way I entered into the Faerie Tribe.

On reflection, whenever the chips have been down and there has been nowhere else to turn, suddenly from out of the blue comes this unfolding of what hadn’t been there before: the offering of a future “Warp” to what is seemingly the meaningless ‘Weft’ of my life until now. And there it is again: the glimmering promise of future purpose!

As an Intersectional Radical Faerie I’m beginning to realise that my queer politico-spiritual purpose is to remain as open as I can be to this very act of Epiphanizing: to keep re-imagining an inclusive future. It isn’t present just yet, but it will become that future allowing our uniquenesses to keep eroding at the intersectionalities of heterosexism, gender binary-ism, ageism, classism, racism and ableism.

Faeries can find the ways for our diverse tribe to keep growing, flourishing and thriving together in harmonious and mutually supportive ways! So Mote It Be!

Cocks, Cunts and Guts Warfare!

Are we in a battle with the prevailing culture? Who’s hearts and minds do we need to win?

I’ve just finished reading ‘Truth or Dare- Encounters with Power, Authority and Mystery’ by the Eco-Feminist Witch Starhawk.

She would maintain that there is a prevailing oppressive culture governed by an outmoded drive to maintain a constant readiness for war. A need to pay homage to a King as: Judge, Censor, Conqueror, Master of Servants, Orderer of the Universe.... “Each aspect carries with it an obsession with its own issues and a view of the self and the world. Each brandishes its own weapons and threats and makes its own particular offer, which presumably we cannot refuse. Each deludes us in its own way and each contains some positive value we must reclaim.”

From this perspective we are seen as subjects to serve the ruling, warring powers who have power-over us. However, our birthright as LGBTQ folk has afforded us a perspective which is able to see this for the nonsense it is. Our own personal drive to become the beings we truly are has enabled us to overcome adverse judgements, has empowered us to speak out when told to shut up. We rock the boat when warned that invaders are afoot. We are prepared to get above our station and we just don’t care when we’re told we just ‘aint natural. We are more comfortable away from structures of Power-over and embrace models respecting our own unique intrinsic power.

Power-over is threatened by Power-with and will oppress, restrict, suffocate, subdue, poison, weaken, threaten, intimidate any attempts to undermine it!

So how do we win out against a war hungry, subjugating culture hell bent on stripping its members of their immanent value? The answer, according to Starhawk, is not to go hearts-and-minds-pleading for it to give a little of its power back. The answer is to team together to reclaim our own personal power as natural creatures of this earth. To invoke the reality of the magick of focussed intention. This is guerrilla warfare with Cunts, Cocks and Guts!

Radial Faerie founding father, Harry Hay famously challenged the early gay civil rights pioneers who were clamoring for assimilation to ‘shed the ugly frog-skin of hetero-conformity’. They were busy pleading for the right to be free from persecution on the basis that they were just like everyone else apart from their sexuality. Ask yourself do you really want to join the queue to join this crazy mixed up society? The fact of our sexuality may be one of the few things we have in common with all those governed by this power-over system.

I don’t need to persuade anyone that I deserve my intrinsic power to be honored. I simply reclaim that power rooted in my own Fire, Water, Earth, Air and Faerie-Spirit. In my determination to be that which (Witch) I am to become. 

Come on- let’s make some magick!

From Death and Decay Emerges Life and Vitality!

In my 55th year I’m finally granted the experience of orphanhood. Dad died last year then, almost to the day, mum went off her food and within 6 weeks was lying in a box in the ground just above him.After years of illness dad’s death had been a relief but mum had been fit and well all of her life so although she was 92 it is still shocking!

I had had that ‘special’ bond that sissy boys can have with their mums- when I was a kid it was me she got to blow-dry her hair and not my sister! Thankfully life moved us on and, whilst I grew up, came out and developed adult-to-adult emotional relationships she granted the space for this and committed to her relationship with that grumpy, patriarchal, emotionally wounded man: my difficult to love father.

After dad died there was the promise of rekindling our closeness. In that final year we spent weekends together doing crosswords, watching TV and just hanging out. We flew to Switzerland for a holiday. We spent last Christmas together. However the plans to get her down to Brighton and for shopping trips to London, were all snatched away.

In what seemed like no time at all, she went from being a totally independent, intelligent and capable woman to an anaemic husk of a being, struggling to  breathe. She’d been offered surgery to bypass the tumor in her stomach but she quickly made up her mind to reject this and opted to die at home in the company of her children. We watched helplessly as she rapidly slipped away.

As a solitary Pagan Taoist Ex-Catholic Faerie I’d felt extremely unsupported spiritually when my father had died. To me, the roman catholic funeral ceremony seemed stuffed with empty, meaningless, liturgical mumbo-jumbo. When I heard that mum had gone off her food, I instinctively ordered Starhawk’s book ‘The Pagan Book of Living and Dying’ anticipating  developing my own closing ritual. Sadly, things moved too quickly and, once again the default ritual clicked into place. This time however I had the support of a special Faerie friend (Flute) who offered to help my mother’s spirit to pass. At the moment of my mother’s death I texted Flute who did the necessary.

I now have a ball of soil from my mother’s grave (Earth), a lock of her hair (Air) and the paper tissue I used to dry the tears I wept at her funeral (Water). I’m going to plant these items in the roots of a Flowering Cherry Tree. My ritual will celebrate the life and vitality which is now occasioned by their death.

As a pot plant may feel both contained yet restrained by its pot, I too have been contained yet restrained by my loving parents. Now the pot is broken. It is time for my roots to feed on the abundant richness of the Earth. Thank-you and RIP Kath and Harry.

Folleterre Faerie Gathering Call

Faerie sing, sing, sing!

Faerie soar like an eagle!

Faerie sing, sing, sing!

Faerie dance in the moonlight! 

Faerie, find a healing space 

To work your Faerie Art!

Caress, hold, nurture, and protect

Every Faerie heart!

The Faeries have come to town!

The Radical Faerie Community is growing in Brighton.

GS interviews Brighton Faerie Mushoom about the Faeries and how they are busying themselves changing the world!

When and how did you identify as a Radical Faerie?

My first Faerie gathering was at Featherstone Castle just 5 years ago. I was lucky to have made friends with a guy who had already been to a few Faerie gatherings. He reckoned that I’d love the Faeries.

He was right. For me, as a lifelong secretly self-identified freak, Featherstone Castle was a magical home-coming to my very own tribe of misfits and marginals. The love of all things natural, the embrace of chaos, the acceptance of all shapes and sizes, the seam of deep spirituality yet the absence of proselytizing and hierarchy made for a very welcoming and nurturing space. It was my first taste of Faerie Sanctuary where I could begin the process of establishing my divinely intended purpose. Since then I have been back to Featherstone every year and I’ve also made a habit of staying at the Folleterre Faerie Sanctuary in Eastern France for a week or two every year as well.

I have always been profoundly affected by each and every gathering I’ve attended, learning about my gender, my sexuality, my undernourished appetites, my woundings, my capacity to self-heal and my previously unseen personal obstacles to self-love, the love of others and ultimately the love of the universe. 

 What do the Radical Faeries mean to you?

To me the Radical Faeries are a deeply rooted international network of divinely inspired beings. As a development of human consciousness, the Faeries have a natural intrinsic intent to nurture the sacred within. The Faeries  do this by generating magical faerie-space, encouraging physical, emotional and spiritual authenticity in all who encounter it directly. Once manifested this authenticity changes the world irrevocably!

What do you understand by the terms ‘Gay’ and ‘Queer’? Which do you identify with, as a Faerie, and why?

Back in 2009 I was a successfully assimilated ‘out’ Gay Man. I was a homeowner in a longterm monogamous same-sex partnership with 2.4 cats! My whole life had been an exercise in demonstrating to the wider society that I deserved equal rights.  For my generation of assimilationists, the prize we ultimately won for the LGBT community was a range of human rights- rights to civil partnership, rights to be able to foster and adopt, rights to an equal age of consent, rights even to join the army if we’d wanted to. 

Trouble was, that once I’d been fully shoehorned into my assimilated box I really couldn’t breath. I felt ungrateful. It felt unsafe to be losing the gift of my outsider status. I didn’t really enjoy my begrudgingly accepted life-style. The Church, who had caused me to throw out the ‘baby’ of my spiritual identity with the corrupt ‘bathwater’ of organized religion continued to disapprove of my nature.

That’s when I met the Faeries. They gave me permission to find a source of spiritual growth in the full cultivation of my sexuality. They invited me to discover the divine purpose of my bi-gendered nature and to reject assimilation as a bad deal. I was afforded intimate exposure, in heart-circle space, to the divine feminine (both within myself and in others)  Happily I have traveled away from the restrictive box of ‘Gay Man’ and I have arrived at the much gentler and less divisive identity of Queer Spirit. This brings me great joy!

What do you think about the rituals in the Radical Faerie community? How do they affect you personally?

1 In my experience, the most profound and transformative ritual in the Radical Faerie Community is the ritual of the Heart Circle. Revealing my heart-felt self to non-judgmental, lovingly accepting Faeries has been both challenging and rewarding. Bearing witness to the revelation of heart-felt truths in a non-judgmental and lovingly accepting way has revealed some surprising shared experiences and also enabled the cultivation of that gift of experiencing the vicarious feel of another Faerie’s moccasins as they go on their own journey. The most potent experience I have had of the powerfully transformative and healing influence of the Heart Circle Ritual was the Folleterre 2013 Sex Magick workshop. 7 days of continuous heart circling with a closed group of Faeries with the intention to create sacred ritual space for the authentic expression of loving touch. I was so impressed by its impact both on myself and others that I’m planning to attend another in October.

2 I also see the ‘Know (or No) Talent Show’ as a wonderful exercise in almost unacknowledged Ritual Space capable of promoting profound personal transformation for those in both ‘performer’ and ‘witness’ roles. As a performer I offer my creative self in total vulnerability. In the role of witness I am able to appreciate, as a practice in unconditional love, the channeled beauty of creation. I’m amazed at the growth I feel from the acknowledgement of my offering. I am enchanted and delighted by the offerings of others.

3 The Faerie Gathering itself is an extended ritual space with its opening ritual invoking the magical healing energies which will nurture the cultivation of our authentic selves. And also its closing rituals helping us to acknowledge the power of the transformative energies we have manifested but also their potential limitations to influence beyond the immediate environment of Faerie Space. 

Do you see the Radical Faeries fulfilling a role in the greater human community? 

Yes! 

What do you think it is? 

The unfurling and fluttering of a single Faerie’s wings in Faerie Space is enough to create a revolutionary wind of change for the planet!

There are now regular Faerie drum circles at the Brighton Unitarian Church.

Request details by joining the Brighton Faerie email group: brightonfaerie@gmail.com

When and how did you identify as a Faerie?

The Faerie known as Presence is writing a thesis on Radical Faeries.

These are the questions asked of us and my answers:

When and how did you identify as a Radical Faerie?

My first Faerie gathering was at Featherstone Castle just 5 years ago. I’d been encouraged to go by a friend I’d made on an Edward Carpenter Community Gay Men’s week. The ECC week had been facilitated by an American Faerie-Sunfire and two Albion Faeries-Shokti Lovestar and Notre Dame des Arbres. The theme of the week was ‘The Dance between Power and Intimacy’. There were workshops on Tantric Sex (based on the Body Electric school), BDSM, cross dressing, heart circles, saunas. In the space of a week I learned to risk vulnerability for the prize of intimacy. My new friend said ‘if you like all of this you’ll love the Faeries’. He was right. For me, as a lifelong secretly self identified freak, Featherstone Castle was a magical home-coming to my very own tribe of misfits and marginals. The love of all things natural, the embrace of chaos, the acceptance of all shapes and sizes, the seam of deep spirituality yet the absence of proselytizing and hierarchy made for a very welcoming an nurturing space. It was my first taste of Faerie Sanctuary where I could begin the process of establishing my divinely intended purpose. Since then I’ve not only been back to Featherstone every year but also to the Folleterre Sanctuary in Eastern France (Rewilding Skillshare 2010, Quiet Gathering 2011, Summer Gathering 2012, Sex Magick 2013, Community Week 2014) I also went to a gathering in Berlin 2010. 

I have always been profoundly affected by each and every gathering I’ve attended, learning about my gender, my sexuality, my undernourished appetites, my woundings, my capacity to self-heal and the previously unseen obstacles to self-love, the love of others and ultimately the love of the universe. 

Describe briefly what the Radical Faeries mean to you.

To me the Radical Faeries are a deeply rooted international network of divinely inspired beings. As a human development its natural intrinsic intent is to nurture the sacred within. The Faeries are  able to do this by generating magical faerie-space, encouraging physical, emotional and spiritual authenticity in those who encounter it directly. Once manifested this authenticity changes the world irrevocably!

What do you understand by the terms ‘Gay’ and ‘Queer’? Which do you identify with, if at all, and why?

Back in 2009 I was a successfully assimilated ‘out ‘Gay Man. I was a homeowner in a longterm monogamous same-sex partnership with 2.4 cats! It seemed that, for my generation of assimilationists. the prize we had won for the LGBT community was a range of human rights- rights to civil partnership, rights to be able to foster and adopt, rights to an equal age of consent, rights even to join the army if I’d wanted to. I felt my whole life had been an exercise in demonstrating to the wider society that as a community we deserved these rights. I was no different from them other than simply having a desire for a same-sex lover. 

But this wasn’t true. Once I was fully shoehorned into my assimilated box I was suffocating. I felt ungrateful. I’d lost the power of my outsider status. I had no sense of joy from my begrudgingly accepted life-style. The Church continued to disapprove of my nature which had caused me to throw out my spiritual identity baby with the corrupt bathwater of organized religion.

However in the journey from that very first ECC gay mens week with its permission to find a source of spiritual growth in the full cultivation of my sexuality, the meeting with the Faeries with their invitation to discover the divine purpose of my bi-gendered nature and to reject assimilation, and the continued intimate exposure in heart-circle space to the divine feminine (in myself and others) I have traveled away from Gay Man and I am now arrived at Queer Spirit.

What do you think about the rituals in the Radical Faerie community? How do they affect you personally?

1 In my experience, the most profound and transformative ritual in the Radical Faerie Community is the ritual of the Heart Circle. Revealing my heart-felt self to non-judgmental, lovingly accepting Faeries has been both challenging and rewarding. Bearing witness to the revelation of heart-felt truths in a non-judgmental and lovingly accepting way has revealed some surprising shared experiences and also enabled the cultivation of that gift of experiencing the vicarious feel of another Faerie’s moccasins as they go on their own journey. The most potent experience I have had of the powerfully transformative and healing influence of the Heart Circle Ritual was the Folleterre 2013 Sex Magick workshop. 7 days of continuous heart circling with a closed group of Faeries with the intention to create sacred ritual space for the authentic expression of loving touch. I was so impressed by its impact both on myself and others that I’m planning to attend another in October.

2 I also see the ‘Know (or No) Talent Show’ as a wonderful exercise in almost unacknowledged Ritual Space capable of promoting profound personal transformation for those in both ‘performer’ and ‘witness’ roles. As a performer I offer my creative self in total vulnerability. In the role of witness I am able to appreciate, as a practice in unconditional love, the channeled beauty of creation. I’m amazed at the growth I feel from the acknowledgement of my offering. I am enchanted and delighted by the offering of others.

3 The Faerie Gathering itself is an extended ritual space with its opening ritual invoking the magical healing energies which will nurture the cultivation of our authentic selves. And also its closing rituals helping us to acknowledge the power of the transformative energies we have manifested but also their potential limitations to influence beyond the immediate environment of Faerie Space. 

Do you think the Radical Faeries have their own myths? If so, could you provide some examples? If not, why do you think that’s the case? 

At gatherings I have heard stories about Lillith, the Vestal Virgins, Loki. Faerie names sometimes invoke mythical figures. Pan, Fauny, Baccus, Sometimes the story of a Faerie’s name is of mythical proportions.

We have stories about our ancestors.....

Harry Hay as a child persuaded the librarian that she ought to get a fashionable Marcel wave in her hair. He assured her that he would look after the library whilst she was at the hairdresser’s. She returned two hours later to find him engrossed in Edward Carpenter’s ‘The Intermediate Sex: A study of some transitional types of men a and women’. He’d found the key to the locked cabinet of forbidden books. The rest is history.

The Faeries are a relatively new development in the growth of humanity. I believe that by living our authentic selves we are inevitably creating the myths of the future. There will be stories told by our great grandchildren about the impact that the Thesis of Presence had on the world!

Do you see the Radical Faeries fulfilling a role in the greater human community? 

Yes

If so, what do you think it is? 

The unfurling and fluttering of a single Faerie’s wings in Faerie Space is enough to create a revolutionary wind of change for the planet!

The Faerie Iconoclasts Who Dared to Re-Imagine Queer

 

So what’s an Icon?

In a literal sense it is a painted image intended to induce a sense of the divine. Over the centuries Queer folk have suffered at the hands the Great Organised Religions' image-makers. Metaphorically, nothing divine has ever been invoked in the painting of our image. In fact quite the reverse!

However I have a personal gratitude to three great secular saints of The Church of Queer who each, in their own ways, have managed to repaint our tarnished image. They have helped us to dare to be our divine selves against all odds.

The great American writer Walt Whitman (1819- 1892), in the Calamus cycle of poems from his magnum opus ‘Leaves of Grass’, re-imagined the then unspeakable love of men-loving-men as the ‘Love of Comrades’; a love so powerful it would transform a warring world into a calm and peaceful global village.

These poems were largely considered to be obscene by Walt’s compatriots. Internationally, however, they excited a new generation of morally oppressed yet nascently radical queer folk. Among them was the Brighton born Edward Carpenter (1844-1929) who was dramatically transformed after reading them. So much so that he sailed to the US to meet, and then make love with, his heroic iconoclast.

He was encouraged in his own writing to re-paint the way in which queerness had been smeared. In his book ‘The Intermediate Sex’ he articulated, to a hostile and highly sexually oppressive Victorian society, the argument for a biological determinant for non-heterosexual sexuality. This was a society which criminalised as morally defective any physical expression of same-sex love. In 1895 Oscar Wilde was sentenced by our great British society to two years of hard labour in prison for daring to be himself!

When he was just a child the Worthing born Harry Hay (1912-2002) migrated with his parents to America. In the local library he managed to break his way into a locked cabinet containing a copy of ‘The Intermediate Sex’. Encouraged by the fact that there were at least some highly respected European writers who took a non-moralistic view of the expression of same-sex love, he developed his own ideas (via his involvement with the American communist party and a love affair with the actor who famously came to play the part of Grandpa Walton). In a post-Stonewall era when queers were increasingly clamouring for ‘we’re just the same as you are- but different’ social and legal acceptance, Harry was busy wondering what was the purpose of queers? Do we not have a unique window of perspective for the wider society and a special subject-subject love devoid of the materialistic and social status considerations implicit in most marriage contracts? Was our purpose not to be visionaries, healers and teachers? Did we not need spiritual sanctuary where our unarticulated sense of purpose and our innate sense of awe at the fabulousness of the natural world could be allowed to flourish unencumbered?

As Faeries we dare to be ourselves and we model the audacity of this radically spiritual act for our non-queer brethren.

Let us then give thanks to Saint Walt, Saint Edward and Saint Harry the Great Faerie Iconoclastic Icons!