Saturday, 6 June 2009

P.R.I.D.E. Time for a Radical Re-think!


This is my GScene column for their PRIDE August edition:


I was brought up to be a good Catholic boy. Anything sexual outside of wedlock was sinful wrong and bad. Homosexuality was intrinsically disordered. Lust was one of the seven deadly, unforgivable sins but so also was Pride along with Gluttony, Greed, Envy, Wrath and one which I can’t remember now. In fact Pride was considered to be the deadliest of all the sins.

I’ve had a great time over the years challenging, dismantling, and then reassembling my moral framework to accommodate the truth of who I am. I’m now a big fan of ‘do unto others as you would have done unto yourself’. I have come to understand that just being who I am can’t be wrong as long as I avoid stuff which involves hurting or causing grief to others or myself. I’ve worked out that doing anything to excess is generally unbalanced and ultimately doesn’t suit me, so getting obsessed over sex, food, wealth, wanting to possess other peoples’ stuff etc is worth avoiding. The seven deadly sins have actually turned out to be a useful moral compass for me.

However as I was in the early stages of coming out in the oppressive 70s I did really like the concept of ‘Gay Pride’. By the age of 20 my religious heritage had succeeded in making me feel dirty, dysfunctional, perverted, and ashamed of my sexual orientation. Pride was a powerful antidote to all of that. But as the years have rolled by and the oppression has melted away like the memory of last night’s bad dream, the idea of being proud about my sexuality does seem now to be a bit bizarre. I don’t feel proud of my feet or even my big toe for that matter! Why pride about this other feature of who I am?

Talking with friends about all this during last year’s PRIDE festivities we decided that the position we find ourselves in these days has parallels with the women’s liberation movement. In the 50s and 60s a growing army of strong women emerged. reacting against their unequal treatment by western society which, thy argued was unfair and unacceptable. Feminists generally won their battles and protections against unequal treatment passed to the statute books. Most women then returned to being women and many fewer women would today describe their identity as being predominantly feminist. Feminism was instrumental in the history of female emancipation. In a similar way Gay Liberation and Gay Pride have been instrumental in the history of our emancipation. But as concepts they are beginning to sound just a little tired and past their sell-by date.

If anyone on the Brighton PRIDE committee is listening out there, is there any chance of dropping the PRIDE and let’s just have a Brighton Diversity Festival? If you must cling onto PRIDE for a little bit longer lets have it as P.R.I.D.E. standing for the Promotion of the Right for Individuals to be Diverse in the Extreme!

Pride has connotations of arrogance and feeling superior to others. It doesn’t make sense any more in a largely accepting wider society and is actually somewhat mildly offensive to them. I’m all in favour of Brighton’s queer community supporting each other in being who we need to be so let’s develop a festival which will help us all to focus on homo/transphobia. Simply sitting pretty full of pride doesn’t hit the mark any more!

1 comment:

  1. Love your column, very thought-provoking and I have to say I agree. 'Pride' isn't a quality I'm really that interested in, due to it's connotations of ego and the fact it's inherently divisive. I'd love for the focus to be more on acceptance and celebration (in fact, I love the word 'celebration' and its positive connotations!). I could never be 'proud' of myself, that's just a little too self-satisfied for my taste...but I could definitely be in for celebrating myself! lol.

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