Monday, 30 June 2014

Are You Out and Proud to your Spirituality?

At the time of writing this I’m in the afterglow of the London Pride weekend.
The highlight for me was a LoveSpirit* meeting at the Wheatsheaf Hall in Vauxhall.
The event was an opportunity to deepen a love for the Unity to be found in spiritual diversity.
In a great venue, in the context of drumming, singing, dancing, relaxing and meditating, some 15 or so souls each had a 3 minute slot to share with the assembled crowd the essence of their own spiritual practice and how this related to their sexual identity/ gender identification.
In my 3 minutes I danced! If I had spoken, this is what I would have said:
“After years of yo-yoing between exploring my sexuality whilst rejecting my spirituality, and then exploring my spirituality whilst rejecting my sexuality, I finally arrived at a realization; my spirituality and my sexuality are inextricably linked. In fact, for me, they are one and the same thing!
What I needed to reject was not spirituality but the guilt and shame of taking pleasure in feeding the natural appetites of my body and soul. For some inexplicable reason over time, the major spiritual traditions have become somewhat tarnished with a homophobic/ transphobic stance on accepting this truth.
So as I searched for a church which might welcome and nurture my spiritual growth I was constantly confronted by a sense that I could only be accepted on the condition that I inhibit the expression of my gender fluidity and sexual expression.
It finally dawned on me that the church I was pining for did not currently exist and if I wanted to be part of a community which was fully accepting of my body and soul, it would be my purpose to manifest it.
I read and was bowled over by Christian de Huerta’s ‘Coming out Spiritually: The Next Step’. I suppose that is when I fully ‘came out’ to my spirituality: I became a spiritual activist! 

Starting as a solitary spiritual practitioner. Cutting out the middle(wo)man priest/ guru/ shaman, I began to meditate and read the Tao Te Ching. Living in the moment. Stringing together surges of Joy in the pleasures of life, pain and death. Nurturing my creative urges. Understanding and dismantling the restrictions I had unknowingly constructed around my capacity to feel and express love. 
I found the unconditional acceptance of my dance in 5Rhythms. 
The Albion Faeries found me and made a space where, in vulnerability, I could be fully accepted and heal the unacknowledged love-blocks arising from my repressed sissy self.
So this is me and this is my dance”

LoveSpirit is a great queer spiritual melting pot. Together we can talk, sing, dance, trance and drum up a wave of love.

Coming out to Spirituality is the start of a great adventure. Feel free to join us on the journey!

*Lovespirit is a grassroots emergence of lgbt+ spiritual discovery, bringing together queers of any or no spiritual tradition who feel the truth of love behind all religious and magical paths.

Thursday, 12 June 2014

A Faerie Ancestor Visitation

Being well 'over the hill'
My body feels old
It aches and it pains!

Whitman and  Broughton
Whisper to me
To the rhythm of train...

On tracks, as I journey
Heading up North
To see my old ma'

I hear:

To the creeping decrepitude of body,
The soul hymns Joy
"Joy to Death: Joy to the Life Eternal"

Mushroom, Walt and James

Saturday, 3 May 2014

Five Steps to Take when Managing your Reactions to Bitchiness in Faerie-Space

So you just found out that some SHADOW-Faerie said something negative about you....?

Check in with yourself. Is the criticism deserved? Is there anything to learn? Has someone called you a lazy selfish bitch and recently you’ve been doing nothing for your community and just looking out for yourself? Be grateful for the kick up the panties!

Wonder about the one who passed on the information to you. What does it say about this faerie? Does it serve some purpose for her to be a broker of negativity. What kind of SHADOW-Faerie is this strange creature?
I once had a work colleague who spent her life in the shadow of an incompetent, uncaring older brother. She gave her life to her mother who determinedly persisted in preferring the brother to herself. She took great pleasure (and caused no end of disharmony) from her habit of witnessing individuals’ pain when she was able to spin a story to them that someone else on the team, because of their status/gender was getting a whole load of credit, reward and preferential treatment for all their hard work!
Are you 100% certain that what has been conveyed is 100% accurate and has been described completely in context?

You may not have been actually 'told' anything. Maybe you have a good sense that a SHADOW-Faerie just doesn’t like you from glances, reactions and body language. 
Ask yourself “Is it really true?”
Are you projecting your memories of a past relationship onto this Faerie?
What, in this past relationship, was so challenging? Did these challenges invite you to make uncomfortable changes to your assumptions and outlook? Did you recoil from this invitation at the time? Are you ready to explore this discomfort now? Is this SHADOW-Faerie offering you another opportunity to grow and develop away from unskillful ways of being? 
Share what you are going through from the heart in spite of the vulnerability you fear!

None of the above? So a SHADOW Faerie has had the audacity to call herself a Faerie. To cast malicious shadows about you! To abuse you and persecute you and speak all kinds of calumny against you!
You have been defamed, maligned, slandered. Your name has been blackened. Your reputation has been sullied. You have been vilified, denigrated, disparaged, discredited!  Your reputation has been ruined!
You have a strong emotional reaction to this.... Ask yourself why?
Is your light so dim? Is your sense of oneness with the Divinity of Nature so compromised that a mere mortal shadow dancer can extinguish your Fire? Remember you are pure radiant light. Only the lack of confidence in this truth will cast you into the dark and the cold!
Are you angry that your capacity to remain joyful from moment to moment in Faerie community is so limited that a single incident like this can cause such a meltdown?

Connect with the divine. Feel the warmth, the strength, the comfort. Is the SHADOW-Faerie projecting shadows from her own past relationships in your direction? Is she unable to recognize what is going on? Is it still too painful for her to forgive and release the discomfort? Know that you are offering her an opportunity to revisit these wounds. Be open to heart centered overtures to explore, understand and heal. If there are no approaches from her then simply stand confidently and compassionately in your power. You are truly beautiful and loving!

Of course it is quite a challenge to go through this whole process. 

The alternative is to say “JUST FUCK IT” and then F-I-I-I-IGHT!

NOTE: The idea of the SHADOW-Faerie is simply that. An IDEA, a MYTH, an ILLUSION. Whatever you do please don’t fall into the trap of believing that Faerie community is made up of SHADOW-Faeries and NON-SHADOW-Faeries. The worst thing you can do is to check out with a fellow Fae if they think so-and-so is a SHADOW-Faerie. It’s the start of a process of divisiveness, dualism, us-and-them-ness, of binary thinking. Thereon lies the path to civil war!

If you think you have discovered a SHADOW-Faerie embrace her and then gently work on finding some source of illumination: if it feels uncomfortable accept it, change it or move away from it. 
You will shine all the more brilliantly for this great work you have done for your Faerie community and you will act as a beacon of brilliance for the world to follow! 
Good Luck!

Monday, 28 April 2014

Which comes first for me? Being Queer or being British? Are you serious?

How is it that 'identity' can cause so much grief?

It’s probably all about our current phase of psychic evolutionary development.

We have grown from reptilian lust-driven Id-centered creatures into mammalian, socially co-operative beings, capable of empathy but also, increasingly, developing a sense of egoic separateness. In the not too distant past, we have struggled to transcend the fleshly demands of our physical selves.

As animals we have always been forced to keep warm and dry, to ensure that we are fed and watered, and to satisfy the hormonally driven impulse to get our rocks off!
Consequently, in a starvation economy, we have needed to gang together and squabble with each other for territory, resources and nookie!

Maybe, as queer-folk, on the margins of all this carry-on, with the perspective of the ‘insider-outsider’, we have found ourselves in the vanguard of those insisting on respect for others and cautioning against the arbitrary identification of otherness as a cynical means of consolidating patriotic allegiances.

I am queer. My family is the international tribe of Faeries. Faeries are LGBTQ and, little by little, straight people too. We are lovers of Nature and she has no geopolitical boundaries.

As a global village we are reaching a tipping point. The numbers of us who are stuck in the lower- necessarily self-focused- reaches of primitive motivation are dwindling and more and more of us have reached a level of self-understanding. We can recognize the damaging consequences both to the planet and to each other of perpetuating the myth that we are separate from nature, from each other and from the divine.

The sooner we ditch those divisive identities tied to national separateness the better. Let us celebrate that “we are simply children of the universe dancing on the edge of time”!

St George’s Day 23/4/2014

The land of Albion shall rise!
The spirit of Albion shall fly!
The people of Albion awaken
To a brand new dream in the making

From beneath the concrete and the suits
There will emerge drumbeats and flutes
Despite the grasp of iron police fists
Freedom will come by turns and by twists
Never mind the bureaucracy and manipulation
Britannia’s giving birth to a rainbow nation

The people of Albion will feel it in their bones
This is our land, it was always our home
Not English, Scottish nor Welsh
The whole of this land is our wealth

Land rich in history, steeped in blood, so much loved
Land full of promise, she gave us her wealth
Albion’s power spread round the globe
Red was the colour of Britannia’s robe

Empire fallen the Brits fumble their way
Slaves to the economy, doped by the media
Lives lived on Facebook Twitter and Wikipedia

But Britons are not slaves to money or machine
We are not here to serve the dark dream
The spirit of Albion shall rise
And illuminate the lies
The people of Albion shall rise!
Be prepared for a big surprise!

Monday, 24 February 2014

A Guided Faerie Dream Manifestation Ritual

As queers we are a tribe with the potential to generate Joy and Love through the discovery of our unexplored purpose.

By discovering and embodying our true nature we act as beacons of hope to those unfortunate enough NOT to have been born in the margins.

Take some time out today in a quiet space. Light a candle if you can.

Breathe in through the right nostril and out through the left three times.
Breathe in through the left nostril and out through the right three times.

1 Concentrate on the base chakra (around the anus and genitals) and imagine the energy of the Earth rising up your legs into it causing it to blossom into a deep red flower.
This is the site of our lusts, appetites and capacity for self healing and is guarded by the Spirit of Earth in the North.

2 Now concentrate on the sacral chakra (inside the abdomen behind the navel) and imagine the energy rising into it causing it to blossom into an orange flower
This is the site of our sense of pleasure and balance.

3 Move your attention now to the solar plexus chakra  (just below the rib cage). Feel the energy rising into it causing it to blossom into a yellow flower. This is the site of our power to create and destroy. It is guarded by the Spirit of Fire in the South.

4 Next is the heart chakra. Feel the energy rising into it causing it to blossom into a green flower. This is the site of our emotional selves. It is guarded by the Spirit of Water in the West.

5 Let the energy move into the base of the neck where the throat chakra sits. Feel it blossom into a blue flower. This is the site of our logic, rationality and egoic personality. It is guarded by the Spirit of the Air in the East.

6 Finally allow the energy to rise to the Third Eye chakra (in the middle of the forehead between the eyes). Feel it blossom into a beautiful purple flower. This is the site of our capacity to sense joy from the realisation of our true purpose.

Imagine a white light above your head. The source of Universal Love.
Let the light pass down over your body like a shower of warm water first passing over the front of your body melting away any stresses and strains and then over the back of your body taking with it any cares and worries.

Enjoy the peace and quietness of this moment.

Now say the following:

I have a dream….

A dream of flight…. 
To Eternal Universal Love

Love For all
Love From all

Disappearance of Dualism
Emergence of Unity

Black-and-White Binaries banished
Rainbow reality manifested

Lusts and appetites melding with the
Ineffable Joy of discovering our unexplored Purpose

Melded with the Power of Authentic Emotion
Ego subjugated to Heart

Let Source be seen as the Way!
Let the Way be our guide!

So mote it be!

Monday, 30 December 2013

The Faerie Iconoclasts Who Dared to Re-Imagine Queer

So what’s an Icon?
In a literal sense it is a painted image intended to induce a sense of the divine. Over the centuries Queer folk have suffered at the hands the Great Organised Religions' image-makers. Metaphorically, nothing divine has ever been invoked in the painting of our image. In fact quite the reverse!

However I have a personal gratitude to three great secular saints of The Church of Queer who each, in their own ways, have managed to repaint our tarnished image. They have helped us to dare to be our divine selves against all odds.

The great American writer Walt Whitman (1819- 1892), in the Calamus cycle of poems from his magnum opus ‘Leaves of Grass’, re-imagined the then unspeakable love of men-loving-men as the ‘Love of Comrades’; a love so powerful it would transform a warring world into a calm and peaceful global village.

These poems were largely considered to be obscene by Walt’s compatriots. Internationally, however, they excited a new generation of morally oppressed yet nascently radical queer folk. Among them was the Brighton born Edward Carpenter (1844-1929) who was dramatically transformed after reading them. So much so that he sailed to the US to meet, and then make love with, his heroic iconoclast.

He was encouraged in his own writing to re-paint the way in which queerness had been smeared. In his book ‘The Intermediate Sex’ he articulated, to a hostile and highly sexually oppressive Victorian society, the argument for a biological determinant for non-heterosexual sexuality. This was a society which criminalised as morally defective any physical expression of same-sex love. In 1895 Oscar Wilde was sentenced by our great British society to two years of hard labour in prison for daring to be himself!

When he was just a child the Worthing born Harry Hay (1912-2002) migrated with his parents to America. In the local library he managed to break his way into a locked cabinet containing a copy of ‘The Intermediate Sex’. Encouraged by the fact that there were at least some highly respected European writers who took a non-moralistic view of the expression of same-sex love, he developed his own ideas (via his involvement with the American communist party and a love affair with the actor who famously came to play the part of Grandpa Walton). In a post-Stonewall era when queers were increasingly clamouring for ‘we’re just the same as you are- but different’ social and legal acceptance, Harry was busy wondering what was the purpose of queers? Do we not have a unique window of perspective for the wider society and a special subject-subject love devoid of the materialistic and social status considerations implicit in most marriage contracts? Was our purpose not to be visionaries, healers and teachers? Did we not need spiritual sanctuary where our unarticulated sense of purpose and our innate sense of awe at the fabulousness of the natural world could be allowed to flourish unencumbered?

As Faeries we dare to be ourselves and we model the audacity of this radically spiritual act for our non-queer brethren.

Let us then give thanks to Saint Walt, Saint Edward and Saint Harry the Great Faerie Iconoclastic Icons!

Saturday, 2 November 2013

The Religious Destiny of Our Tribe: Queer Gender-F**k Spirituality

When I was very young my parents taught me that our family were members of an exclusive club. As such we knew what was what! We knew what was good and knew what was bad. If we were nice, then, when our lives came to an end, the “very essence of who we were” would receive an invite to a fabulous party from a kindly old Father Christmas kind of a bloke. If not then we were toast!

If we could follow a few simple rules then lifetime membership was assured. Fine and dandy until I discovered that I was ‘intrinsically disordered’- still ‘loved’ by the membership as a transgressor but acknowledged to be engaged in unacceptable practices and headed for the incinerator. My crime? I was a male lover of men.

Sadly the faerie tale with the happy ending beyond the grave blew up in my face. The club waited patiently for me to do the honourable thing but I refused to crawl away in shame.

Instead I rejected the whole non-sense of it all and signed up as a Five-Star member of the club which dedicated itself to affirming the ridiculousness of every tenet of that exclusive club. There was no ‘good’, no ‘bad’, no ‘very essence of who we are’, no kindly old bloke, no party, no incinerator! There was a scientific explanation for everything and anything considered to be inaccessible to scientific enquiry was simply decidedly dodgy.

I managed for a few years until ‘the very essence of who I was’ began to feel ignored, neglected and undernourished. Unscientifically I identified this aspect of myself as my Spiritual Nature and set about looking at how to tend to its special needs. None of the popular exclusive clubs wanted to help me. I learned the technique of meditation and found that a state of mindfulness allowed some breathing space for what came next.

I began to see that to fulfil my potential I needed to find ways of exploring and developing BOTH my Spiritual Nature AND my Queer Self in ways that had, until then, seemed impossible.

I would need to manifest and become the religion I was seeking. And finally I would learn that my Spiritual Nature IS my Queer Self!

The word religion derives from the latin word religare which means to bind. It is only relatively recently in the history of western religion with its attacks on pagan earth respecting traditions and its slaughter of cat-keeping witch-faggots that queers have been demonised by religious groups

More enlightened ancient cultures used to recognise their sexuality and gender variant members as ‘two spirit’ or ‘walkers between worlds’. They were simply respected for their giftedness. From the margins it is second nature to understand conflict and heal it. Ancient queer priest-priestesses were afforded sacred roles in the creation of tribal ritual, which served in the re-binding of the communal spirit with itself and the divine. 

Let us all therefore reclaim our ancient heritage as Queer Spirit Warriors!
Let us joyously manifest Queer Genderfuck Spirituality!
May the Church of Queer heal the wounds of our global village!


Friday, 30 August 2013

A Faerie Tale of SexMagick

Once upon a time and not so very long ago, three SexMagicians came to the Faerie-village of Folleterre from across the vast ocean.
They spoke of the beauty to be borne of a complete love for one another.
But we Faeries were wounded and afraid.
Our desire for physical passion had been wrenched away from our natural gifts with emotional intimacy from as far back as we could remember.
We said “Sure, as a gang of Faeries, we can have an orgy”.
We said “We know how to be caring and concerned for each other”.
“But”, we said, “ although we wish it were different, there’s no way we can do sex AND emotional intimacy at the same time”.
“Yes there is” the SexMagicians said.
“Trust us and together we will create the most beautiful and secure container which will bring to pass what, right now, seems like an impossibility”.
“It won’t be easy”, they said, “ but with patience, and bravery, and determination from everyone, it will happen”.
The prize seemed worth at least some effort. So we all agreed to try.
Chas-an elder and the wisest of the SexMagicians- led the way.
He told us “We will be sharing our deepest selves- from the heart- hour by hour by hour and day by day by day - until, one by one, we will finally all know that the container is secure”.
The second SexMagician-Sister Ethica Slut: a perpetually-indulgent-mother superior-kind-of-magician helped to keep us clean organised and focussed.
The third SexMagician-Rosie Delicious: a man-boy creator with a gentle sadness about his eyes told us what we needed to do next.
“Faggots” he said “are just bundles of weak and brittle twigs"
"On our own, we Faerie-faggots are weak and brittle, but bound together we are strong. Together we can burst forth with a flaming passionate love"
"All it takes is some patience to bring our weak and brittle twigs to the circle and hour by hour by hour and day by day by day we will weave those twigs into the most amazing, elaborate basket that any of us have ever seen"
"This will be the container which will allow us to love each other with both passion and intimacy” 
Then off we went, one by one, sharing the twisted brittle intimacies of our unique vulnerabilities, nervous at first but growing in confidence; encouraged by the gentle compassion of the SexMagicians. 
Hour by hour by hour and day by day by day we shared and we wove. We shared and we wove.
One faerie saw the beauty of the basket right at the start and said so!
Then another Faerie saw the beauty of the basket we were weaving and knew it was safe- she said so too! 
Finally, one by one, (hour by hour by hour, day by day by day), the basket was seen as beautiful, safe and secure by every Faerie in the circle.
And we all said so too!
SexMagick bursts into the village
A loud noise
A blinding light
The basket begins to shudder
And then it is alive!
Leaves sprout, flower buds blossom.
Birds sing at the spectacle.
Butterflies dance around disco petals.
Bees sense the sweetness of the air.
And we are in Eden
Thank-you for bringing SexMagic to Folleterre Chas, Ethica, Rosie
To open up to new vistas of conciousness go to

Thursday, 15 August 2013

Joie de Folleterre

A fabulous Folleterre Word Collage from Faerie Laureate Qweaver

Joie de Folleterre

A time for joy.
Tears ripen.

Nothing in the trees’ gaze contradicts the flowers
that dare declare they love. All the colours of music,
all the music of the forest, bright with wonder’s blessing.

Think of it as a merry-go-round,
a subaqueous garden.

Bones blur, outlines loosen, a little like trees, indistinct
in summer’s haze, splinters smoothed away.
Hands unfold, steady on another’s touch.
Around the flames of laughter,
the glow of conversation,
kisses tickle, settle,
rest, depart, rainbow-winged.
Settle again and again.

There is something like music that eases each
separate note into one swelling melody.

Wildly beautiful shapes, colours, swirl
and swoon in this lava lamp.

Somewhere bees get busy with tomorrow’s fruiting.
As your fingers coax rope into baskets I drop
my doubts inside. Your offering eyes ignite
my soul that’s been singing
to itself these years, by the far lake.

Yes, eyes meet here, shadows
steepen their lustre
into jewel-light that
bursts beyond words.

Words are clumsy messengers. Here the language is pretty
wraps, wigs, dresses sexpressively excessive.
Fireworks fixed in half motion. Star-beams caught
between silk and skin,
skin and skin.

With the night they sprawl shifting abruptly to dodge
the fire’s frisky smoke.

The days would be roaring and hungry,
gone in a few gulps, just flakes
to record the feast.

A time for sadness.
Dreams ripen. You snuggle in my heart.