1
.... i'm present at a Faerie gathering.....
.... wandering around feeling like i don't belong....
.... wandering around feeling like i don't belong....
.... some folk going off somewhere and i jokingly trying to find out what they're up to....
.... young Faerie quietly tells me that my questioning is 'overly-intrusive' and where they are going will be unknowable to me....
.... refers me back to a time when folk were meditating in a workshop and i was (unforgivably) using my mobile phone to call people....
.... i know that at the time i must have been 'in the spirit' of the workshop but can't exactly recall what she is referring to....
.... i know that what i'm being accused of is something i would not normally do....
.... i try to talk with her about it to help me remember what had actually happened....
.... she shuts me down and refuses to discuss it any further....
.... i'm preoccupied by the sense of being unjustly accused....
.... it's a familiar feeling and i adopt my usual position of welcoming this 'shadow' into my experience....
.... but there's a smouldering sense of wanting to become an outspoken 'shadow' in this gathering....
2
.... a familiar Faerie comes over to me, sits down and rests her legs across mine....
.... she recalls the time last night when i sucked her cock and she came in my mouth....
.... i joyfully remember the sweet taste of her semen as she spurted her ecstasy into my mouth....
.... (she had been wearing a Santa Claus hat with red flashing fairy-lights and in the darkness of the bushes we had been transported to a psychedelic red-light disco of sensation)....
.... but she was crest-fallen and told me that someone had approached her to say that they had witnessed it all and that ejaculation at gatherings was 'offensive' to them....
.... she wanted to check with me that there was indeed a rule that we had broken....
.... i told her that i hadn't been to a gathering for a while but this certainly wasn't a rule i was aware of....
.... again that smouldering sense of being called -or rather confronted- to take this on....
3
.... i 'm reminded of the rules at naturist gatherings where nudity is acceptable but there is the rule to carry a towel around to sit on-reminding us all of the need to protect the community from the dangers of bottom contamination!....
.... i say to her 'don't worry - it's probably something to do with some Faeries' phobia of bodily fluids'....
.... i'm overheard and suddenly realise i have become 'That Shadow Faerie' for daring to speak out this authentic speculation....
.... this means for some or many, i have now become 'Other'....
.... i, for them, am the enemy within our co-constructed utopian family....
.... i walk away from the gathering with that 'not-belonging-feeling' again....
.... walking past shops now.... there's a second-hand furniture shop and i leap and bounce off one of the chairs- i realise immediately i shouldn't have done it.....
.... the shopkeeper sees what i did and raises an eyebrow but doesn't remonstrate with me....
4
.... i find myself now in familiar surroundings- i used to live in this neighbourhood years ago....
.... i'm trying to walk up a hill but finding that, in spite of enormous effort, i'm hardly moving forward at all.....
.... there's someone behind me and i invite them to pass rather than try to keep ahead of them....
.... i look down at my feet and see that they are floating above the pavement....
.... i remember once again that i can fly but i'm now carrying books and a bunch of bananas and don't want to fly with these encumbrances....
.... so i slip them into the suitcase i'm wheeling behind me....
.... i'm now in a hotel corridor and aware that because of the suit case i must appear to be one of the guest here but i haven't paid for a room....
.... i take the case downstairs to the reception area....
.... wanting get away but having to continue to offload things into my suitcase....
.... the receptionist is confused by my behaviour but assumes i'm there to check out....
.... i'm still taking things out of my pockets and slipping them into the case....
.... i'm holding a wallet containing my valuables- it's in the form of a tiny handbag....
.... i decide to hold on to this and slip it into my inside pocket....
.... i try to recall where my laptop is and remember that it is safe back at the gathering....
5
.... but now the reception area is becoming crowded with scores of folk checking out....
.... i look for my suitcase but it is now lost in a sea of similar looking suitcases....
.... hotel porters are busy loading the luggage into the coaches waiting outside....
.... i approach them and ask if they have seen a large black suitcase
.... only to see that all the loaded suitcases are large and black but don't quite look like mine....
.... i'm desperate to convey that the case was in the reception area just two minutes ago....
.... surely it cant be that far away....
.... they point to a massive container-load of suitcases and say that if it was in the reception area it would now have been removed to this container ready for loading onto the coaches....
.... there's a part of me that isn't really bothered- I still have my valuables and laptop so what is there to worry about.....
.... but then they start to speculate about an employee who was recently fired from his job....
.... it wasn't clear what his job had been but there had been some sort of incident and a number of the hotel guests had complained about him....
.... 'it's probably him getting his revenge.... he'll have stolen it thinking you was one of the complainants'....
6
.... 'he's going to track you down- I'd be careful if I was you sir!'.....
