Monday 16 February 2009

16 Life is like a gay sauna......


I'm back in Spain again. This time Barcelona and here for 10 days. Got myself a room in a nice discrete Hotel in the gay quarter of the city Eixample [pronounced ey-eecham-pley] also known jocularly as Gaixample [ga-ee-sham-pley]. I'm about 5 minutes walk from the main cluster of pubs and clubs which are peppered around the street on the grid just one block north and two blocks east of where I'm based. Not that I've done that much since I've arrived but it's good to feel ensconced in a gay-friendly world. It's now day 3 of the holiday and really I've just been getting some sleep and rest and taking it nice and easy. Had a quick foray onto the scene on Saturday night when I arrived but I just don't think I was in the mood for it.

Started at Punto BCN bar which, has a great mix of people and always seems to be reasonably attitude free. Moved on to Dietrich’s, which was an interesting mix of younger guys and older guys, all dancing to house music [or whatever you call that uh-uh-ur-ur-uh-uh-uh-ur-ur-ur type music]. Didn't really do it for me and kinda just felt like a bit of a spectator. Still only drinking tonic water. And being charged the same price as for a G&T or a V&T rankles a bit. But I'm still happy to be hangover free the next day making me able to stay chilled and be capable of doing something more creative than just padding around nursing a sore head. Anyhoo- from there felt like I ought to check out a club and had always wanted to see the Arenas- 4 clubs on 2 sites separated by a 3 minute walk. My guidebook said pay for one get into all 4, so I rushed off to what seemed would offer the best entertainment for th evening, Paid my €12 [almost £12 at the current dreadful exchange rate] and started my wander around. Sadly I think I made a bad choice, or arrived there too early because I had gained access to two vast areas, one above the other, peopled by what seemed to be a handful of children. The music was playing, a few of the kids were dancing, most were standing around like me waiting for something to happen. Granted it was only 2 am, and in Spain you don't expect things to get started until 3-4am but I just couldn't hack it. To make matters worse, when I checked to see how I could explore the other two clubs I was told I could only get a stamp if I waited until 3.30am. Hmm!

Took myself off in disgust to Martin's bar a good 10 minutes walk away on the bear circuit. Had to queue for a while, paid my €12 and this time I accessed 3 floors-each the size of a reasonably proportioned living room- no maybe 2-3 living rooms- packed with bears and cubs in leather or close fitting T-shirts designed to emphasize deltoids, biceps and pecs. I was way out of place in my Hawaiian shirt! On the top floor is a porn cinema with a large dark room behind. Wandered in there and once again spectated as a zombified procession of expressionless men filed by. There were a few skirmishes of sex breaking out but for the most part it just seemed like everyone was locked into an attitude which had them wanting to approach but stopping themselves out of fear of rejection or shame at being seen as approaching someone unworthy.

It's the kind of process you sometimes get in a busy sauna. Everyone's looking for someone that little bit better who is maybe just around the corner...... bit like life and relationships really. Maybe the more choice you have the pickier you get and the greater the chance to develop 'choice anxiety'. The fewer the choices the easier it is to commit and make an effort investing in the choice you've made!

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